oopps

Ok so I've been very slack lately, not to worry, Arsenal's performance was excellent last night, I'm in my new flat and now have use of a swimming pool, and I got paid today (although not as much as I hoped). This does mean that I am ready to go out on the beers big time this weekend, boat race starting just down the road by Putney bridge, see you there losers

The proposition

I am going to start by saying if this works I will be very surprised. If I was a gambling man I would bet against it but for the sake of social experimentation I am willing to give this a go. For this experiment, I am going to stake a huge quantity of my own money, a whole tenner in fact (equivilant of nearly 4 pints of lager in Wetherspoons, 5 packs of Biltong, 100 miles worth of diesel if I could get my car to start or a hand shandy of the minger from Girls Aloud). So, what is this exciting new sociological experiment I am talking about, well, here it is plain and simple.....

I want to turn £10 into £1000 within the next month, I think it is possible if we are clever about it. So 30 days, that is roughly 17% increase day on day, the first day we should be up to £11.70 and then £13.7, £16 and so on until we hit the £1000 around day 29. This £1000 will then be going behind a bar somewhere in London for all participants to enjoy a few beers and plan the next one. The smart ones of you out there, you know who you are, will have noticed the word participants, this refers to those people who are willing to send me tips on a regular basis, I think 10 over the course of the next 30 days should do it, for horses, dogs, football teams, rugby teams and any other sort of team or individual you think can win something which we can bet on. The choice of bets will be down to me along with how we stake the money but ultimately those who take part should feel involved with the process.

I am going to start off proceedings with a bet on Arsenal to go through to the next round of the Champions League, I know it's tomorrow but not a lot I can do about that as the games today are all a bit sketchy, I will update if I see something good though or if someone emails in any suggestions that get approved.

My name is Jon ... update

Null points - yes i'm being lazy

Fighting talk

Right, I'm having another one of those days, the bloody estate agents are messing me around again and I'm pissed off with work, the tube, not being paid yet and the prospect of being homeless in a few weeks. Therefore we are going to have a little discussion which relates to something I heard about a month or so ago

This is a fake story but it does raise the important question of just how many midgets it would take to defeat a lion

http://www.newturfers.com/mwf/attach/38/355838/BBCNEWSWorldLionMutilates42MidgetsinCambodianRing-Fight.htm

There are a few things to bare in mind here, is the lion hungry, is it tame, are the midgets tame, are they indeed proper midgets or just little people - this could go on an on. I'm going to fire the first shot and say 50 midgets would do it, Cambodian or otherwise (we have to exclude Pygmy's from this 'cause they are trained to hunt wild animals, I reckon 10 of them would have a lion no problem).

Please email in and I will post the answers to this for further discussion. If you have any other match ups you would like to see then please let me know. Some ideas I have so far are a Whale vs The Thames (snigger), Christina and Brittney vs me and a bottle of baby oil (in your dreams, bitches), Killer Whale against Great white shark. Getting bored of thinking stuff up now but please if you have any ideas let me know

The end of the road......

Hursty last night...

"I don't mind living next door to her, as I really like this one. Think she might be 'THE' one."

Oh dear boys...

Racing tips for Tuesday 21st..

A few points up today, good amount of losers

Big Rob 4:30 Exeter 21Feb Lost
De Blanc 3:00 Exeter 21Feb Lost
Polar Gunner 4:50 Sedgefield 21Feb 6/4 won
Bang And Blame 3:20 Sedgefield 21Feb Lost
Young Collier 4:30 Exeter 21Feb Lost
Canavan 3:20 Sedgefield 21Feb Lost
Genelardais 3:30 Exeter 21Feb 11/8 won
Saameq 5:15 Wolverhampton 20Feb Lost
Basilea Star 3:30 Exeter 21Feb Lost
Ten-cents 1:40 Lingfield 21Feb Lost

Come on LOSE....

My Boss

Cunt. Has no balls and no life. Can't manage himself let alone me and if he asks me anything in a condescending way again I am likely to twat him.

Northern line

Rant rant rant. I think the tube workers are lazy. They get about half a year's holiday and still seem to be half arsed about their jobs. Sod them, if they get abuse it's there own fault. You can at least tell the people crammed into the train why we are stuck in a tunnel for 10 minutes and apologise for being shit. I hate the tube and the lazy people who run it

Customers

They're fucking stupid. I've just had one woman on the phone who did not know what I meant when I said "click the right mouse button" - "how do I know which is the right button?". Fucking morons. Any other client stories please email them in and I'll try and post them if I'm not too busy dealing with the other retarded customers I have

March 20th - lads, google this date

For all you boys out there who had to endure a crappy romantic meal followed by "tonight it's all about you Honey" sex on 14th Feb it is time for payback. The top listing on google should say it all so just enter March 20th into the google box above and all will become clear. Now it is our responsibility to take this valuable information and educate the masses. Make it so....

Boredom with work

I am really really fucking bored today. It's Monday, I've had a shitty weekend and there's a whole fucking week to go before I can have another lie in. However, I do get paid this week which is a bonus and I am also single again so looking forward to some hunting this weekend.

Al you keen for Inferno's????

Racing tips for Monday 20th..

Cark 2:25 Wolverhampton Lost
Debbie 5:15 Wolverhampton Won at 10/1!!!!!
Bobby Charles 4:30 Lingfield 3rd place
Blue Hedges 3:20 Lingfield Lost
Legacy 3:35 Wolverhampton Lost
Western Sky 2:50 Lingfield Lost
Mansiya nap 3:55 Lingfield Lost

Well the one winner we had today was annoying, 10/1 shot. Maybe I'm getting better at picking these winners.

Racing tips for Friday 17th..

About 3.2 points up today, it looks like each day goes a different way so maybe we should back the horses tomorrow

New Perk 3:50 Fakenham 2.66-2.68, 1.4-1.45 1st place
Miss Skippy nap 3:50 Fakenham 7.2-7.4, 2.12-2.48 Lost
Euro American 4:00 Market Rasen 2.92-2.96, 1.43-1.48 2nd place
Caraman 4:30 Market Rasen 4.2-4.3, 1.76-1 3rd place
Obrigado 4:40 Wolverhampton 5.3-5.5, 2-2.16 Lost
Baylaw Star 4:40 Wolverhampton 15.5-16, 4.2-5. 3rd place
Tambourine Davis 4:50 Fakenham 3-3.05, 1.23-1.38 2nd place
Wyldello nap 4:50 Fakenham 1.92-1.95, 1.13-1.14 1st place

Ups and downs this week, lets see what happens today. There are few races where there are two horses so see how this pans out